


Se Moquer

by churb



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, F/M, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, basically a chara swap version of the derse prison scene, jake goes crockertier, see it's just referenced
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-16
Updated: 2014-08-16
Packaged: 2018-02-13 10:59:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,407
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2148210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/churb/pseuds/churb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A story is shared. Sort of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Se Moquer

**Author's Note:**

  * For [YumiChanLikesChainsaws](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=YumiChanLikesChainsaws).



> disclaimer: i do not support violence towards or intent to hurt jane, or women, at all. i do not support violence towards anyone, in fact. this is merely to prove a point.

"Jake."  
  
Jane's not entirely impatient so much as she is rather nervous. In fact, if she had to put it into words she would probably suggest that Jake had gone completely crazy.  
  
It was quite the twist of fate that the whole Crocker brainwashing deal hadn't been directed at her, no. In fact, it had been directed at Jake, of all people. Jane wasn't quite sure what made him worthier, or more useful, but she internally cursed herself for not being more prepared for it. (Jade had brainwashed her own grandpa. Nice.)  
  
Which brings her back to now, and she's sat in a prison cell and Jake's glaring at her as menacingly as a five foot two teenage boy with floppy hair and a bright crimson speedo can pull off.  
  
"Can't you at least tell me what's going on?" It's not like he's going to answer her question, but still, she proceeds. "What happened to your grandma? What did she put on your head? Why did you _punch_ me?? I...Jake, please."  
  
And finally, he speaks. "No."  
  
Well, there's a start.  
  
"But, Jake, I."  
  
"Jane this is going to sound frightfully rude, not that I care about that. But I honestly suggest you put a cork in it before I have to hurt you. Again." Damn. Jake crosses his arms as much as he can with a cat on them. "Having recently been indundated with more knowledge and logic than a lad could care for, it stands to reason that I'm not particularly fond of your pathetic blabbering anymore."  
  
Jane narrows her eyes at that. "I'm getting tired of your antiquated horseshit, Jake. Snap out of it."  
  
"Oh now you've done it!" Jane shrinks back a little at that, her temporary burst of confidence somewhat shrivelled. "If your intent is to welcome another knuckle sandwich instead of the reason for your whereabouts then I  _implore_ you to keep talking."  
  
A pause. Jane does not.  
  
"Good. Now I know you have ears, Janey, and we'd both be cheered to the ends of the earth if you could make good use of them." Jake pauses, again, for effect. "Splendid. Now, listen. I plan to inherit a rather dandy empire rather soon. The whole Earth, in fact! Once the whole repopulation doodah's kicked in. It'll be just ducky. But I can't rule alone, Jane! I'm going to need a loyal wife. As you do. And that is where you come in."  
  
All Jane can manage is a weak, almost tearful "What."  
  
"You and I will be wed, and we will rule my empire together with an oven mitt of the finest iron. Not that you'll be wearing said mitt, of course. You're a tad too thick for that kind of authority. Well, more than a tad. This is more a male area if you don't mind my saying...not that I care if you do.  
  
"....You sound like Caliborn." Jane mutters, biting her lip.  
  
"Of course." And Jake actually smiles, and it's terrifying. "But I digress. As my wife, and as a wife does, you will do exactly as I say the moment I say it. You'll be cheerful, obedient, and scantily clad." A pause. "Or maybe a blue jumpsuit. I haven't quite made my mind up yet."  
  
(Somewhere along this monologue Jane starts to cry. Jake ignores her.)  
  
"You'll have to provide me with children as well, Jane, and rather a lot at that. All to be obedient, loyal, _perfect_  little heirs or heiresses! My imperial legacy has to continue on after all, so I'll just  _have_ to assume you can handle it. Pregnancies aren't exactly hard work, you know."  
  
Not that sex education was particularly prevent on Jake's island.  
  
"You did promise me a zillion babies, Crocker. And I do hope you're going to keep your word."  
  
Jane sobs again. Jake grits his teeth and ignores it.  
  
"As I was saying. Our children can rule our empire after our passing, not that that'll ever happen. We'll be immortal, of course. And young and beautiful and  _in love._ Forever. And  _ever._ "  
  
The notion of this scares Jane into speaking.  
  
"Jake, please, don't do this. I don't want to get married! I don't want to get married to you or have your babies! I just want to go home! I want to go back to my dad and my baking and when everything was simple and I didn't have people constantly telling me I was incapable or useless! I want to go back to Earth, Jake! I want to go back to when you didn't hate me and want me to be your wife slave whatever!"  
  
Jane lifts the pointed edge of her Maid garb and blows her nose on it.  
  
"Aw, Janey. Come on. Don't do that, that's gross."  
  
A gentler female voice snaps Jane out of it and forces her to look up.  
  
"...Roxy?" Jane blinks, and dries her glasses on her sleeve. "Brain Ghost Roxy! You came back for me? Oh, Roxy, do something!"  
  
"Sorry Janey, nothin I can do." Roxy looks rather disappointed at this, shrugging. "It's not like I'm real n' shit, is it. You're gonna have t' wing this one by yourself."  
  
"Oh, Roxy, please. Are you sure there's nothing you can do?"  
  
"Nope. Nada. I'm only as real as your ability to believe in me."  
  
"But. But I do believe in you. I believe in everyone."  
  
Roxy actually seems to scoff at that, and Jane inches away in surprise.  
  
"Janey, don't take me for a. For a fuckin' idiot. You've believed in exactly  _shit_ your whole life and you  _know it._ You. Uh. You know it." Roxy almost seemed to asterisk herself in her head. "Everything's always about you. Like, perma. 100%. I thought we already discusc. Dic. Discussed this."  
  
_God,_ thought Jane, _of all the times to drink._  
  
"But I don't want to--"  
  
"Jane."   
  
Oh hell, Jake is noticing her again. Jane sobs some more.  
  
"Jesus, Janey. Stop fuckin crying. It's making both of us look  _super_ bad."  
  
Jane barely manages a "Sorry."  
  
"Jane." Jake's getting impatient, and it's obvious. "Who in the bejeezus are you talking to?"  
  
Jane would have laughed if it were an appropriate time.  
  
"Brain Ghost Roxy."  
  
"....I'm sorry?"  
  
"Brain Ghost Roxy." Jane repeats herself.  
  
"Brain gho-- Oh give it a  _rest_  Jane! You're obviously lying."  
  
"No! I'm not! I'm talking to Bra--"  
  
" _'Brain Ghost Roxy'_ sounds almost as fabricated as...Well. As she is I suppose."  
  
Jane dissolves back into sobs.  
  
"Oh for cris'sakes, Crocker. Pull yourself together. What kind of wife are you?"  
  
Jane just cries harder.  
  
"He's got a point, gotta say."  
  
"What kind of lady reacts in such a childish way when the existence of her imaginary chum is questioned?"  
  
"Oh my fuckin... _Janey._ Stop crying and. And like. Woman up! Punch him in the face, or something."  
  
Jane's not entirely sure she can handle being criticised on two sides at the same time. "But I don't  _want_ to punch him in the face, Roxy! I want to go  _home!_ "  
  
"Punch who in the face?"  
  
Jane manages to breathe. Jake pinches the bridge of his nose.  
  
"And to think you thought I might actually  _reciprocate_ your childish ruddy feelings. Don't get the wrong idea, Jane. I bear absolutely no attraction to you at all. If I didn't need you to have my children and help me rule my empire, I'd chop you up right here and feed you to my grandma. Well. Granddaughter. Erm."  
  
Jake pauses, before dropping the issue, as Jane's cries get louder.  
  
"You're lucky you're _somewhat_ pretty."

* * *

In some point in the actual, real universe, Dirk pinches the bridge of his nose.  
  
"Cal."  
  
Caliborn looks up from his drawing. "What."  
  
"That's not what happened at all."  
  
"Are you calling me a liar, Strider. That is,  _exactly_ what happened. Word for fuckin word."  
  
"Word for word, maybe. But it was Jake in prison, and Jane that went, well. Batshit. And Brain Ghost Roxy?"  
  
Caliborn considers this.  
  
"Maybe. But that version was too funny. English cried like a damn human infant. That's not heroic at all. It's much more realistic if it was Crocker doing the incessant weeping."  
  
"Funny?" Dirk takes a moment to comprehend it. "Cal, that's not  _funny_. Jake's seriously fucked up from it. It's just as  _funny_ as it would be for anyone else! Who would find this bullshit funny?"  
  
Caliborn considers this as well.  
  
"Well. Mostly, the entire internet."

**Author's Note:**

> this is really insipid isn't it
> 
> w/e the point was made


End file.
